Too much excitement just might kill me!
Since Monkey was born, I have become the proud owner of what I lovingly call ‘banana legs’. See below.
(It has proven to be quite difficult to photograph my own legs. That fluffy thing underneath is a dog.)
So sexy. Most of the time I have no idea what I did to get these bruises, and don’t remember when they occurred.
I’m not sure if it’s a result of sleep deprivation-induced clumsiness with an added side of ‘can’t see because I’m carrying a baby’ or if I have always been really clumsy but never realised because I used to sit in front of a computer for 8 hours a day. Or possibly ‘must prevent impending baby/dog showdown, no time to dodge furniture’.
Maybe I should invent shin pads for parents. They could come in a glorious variety of colours and patterns, like the Baby Legs I love so much. They’re super cute on little ones… that will scale won’t it?
Useful in the infant stages for when you keep walking into the corner of your coffee table. Useful in toddlerhood when they ride the tricycle into your legs. And again in the teenage years when they take up slam-dancing. No?
Did you notice a significant increase in accidental self-inflicted injuries after your kids were born? Will I ever get my unblemished yet still pasty white legs back?