Too much excitement just might kill me!
Every day, when Hubs comes home from work, he stops off at the toilet before heading outside to play (as you do).
Monkey adores his Daddy, and follows him everywhere – including into the toilet. I guess when you have a penis, you need to see a lot of demonstrations to work out how to handle the thing? In any case, Monkey is fascinated with watching Hubs pee.
But this inevitably gives poor Hubs performance anxiety! So every time, this is what I hear from behind the toilet door…
M: (very matter of fact) Dad wee! Dad wee! … Dad wee! Dad wee!
[pause for breath]
M: (increasingly insistent) Dad wee! Dad wee! Dad wee!! Dad wee? Dad wee!
H: I’m trying!! Just be quiet for a minute will you?!
M: Dad wee! Dad wee! Dad wee!
[sound of trickling water]
M: (with great enthusiasm) Dad wee! Dad wee! DAD WEEEE!!!!
I feel sorry for Hubs, I really do, but I find the whole exchange utterly hilarious.
I’m also glad it’s not me. Or maybe I’m immune now, since the only way I’ve been able to use the toilet in the last 2 years is in the presence of another (admittedly small) person. Nobody can hold it in that long…